


Blanket Hog

by KadeWriting



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Blanket Stealing, F/M, Fluff, Nudity, Revenge, Tickling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-04
Updated: 2015-08-07
Packaged: 2018-04-12 21:37:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4495608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KadeWriting/pseuds/KadeWriting
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Response to Tumblr OTPPrompts: Person A returns home really late at night (some time in the stupid hour…like 3am) after a really long meeting or something and is so ready to hit the sack - only to discover that Person B went to bed a few hours earlier and took literally all of the covers.</p><p>Edit: Now with a part two, as requested! Revenge -albeit a fluffy revenge - is had!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Crime Committed

**Author's Note:**

> If you're looking for anything more than five minutes of fluff, you're looking in the wrong place. There's no plot, real dialog, or even much scenery description. This is just something fun and light to get the fingers moving again.

It was well past midnight when the party finally trudged into the safety of Skyhold. Every member of the small group - Lavellan, The Iron Bull, Varric, and Dorian - was having difficulty keeping their eyes open as their mounts plodded along, drawn instinctively towards the warmth of the stables. As she nearly dozed off and almost fell off her mount's back, Lavellan cursed herself for letting the men talk her into traveling through the night instead of bedding down and finishing their trip in the morning. _My back hurts. I want my real bed_ , Dorian had complained. _We're out of rations Boss_ , Bull had pointed out. She had relented, sighing as she maintained her seat on her mount's back; the fact that Varric had casually whispered to her that she'd get to see Cullen sooner rather than later was not something the Tevinter or Qunari needed to know.  
  
Normally the return of the Inquisitor warranted a gathering of residents, pilgrims cheering as their beloved Herald returned from yet another dangerous mission, guards and soldiers saluting their highest commander, and Horsemaster Dennett coming out to take their animals from them. As late as it was, however, only the night guards waved them down and greeted them. One of them sent a serving maid to fetch some fruit and bread for the weary party while another lead their animals to the stables.  When the girl returned with a basket of food, they each took a handful gratefully, taking bites between jaw-cracking yawns as they navigated their way to their rooms by muscle memory alone.  
  
The walk from the courtyard to the door that lead to her private rooms was enough to give Lavellan marginally more energy, enough so that she could actually navigate the stairs leading to her private room without tripping and breaking her nose. She yawned and stretched as she reached the landing, then shuffled over to her bed and sat down on the side with a thump. She took a moment to smile at the snoring mountain of blankets on the other side of the bed before fiddling with her boots and armor, dropping each piece into a careless pile as they came off her lithe form. She knew that in the morning Cullen would press his lips into a frown the way he always did at her lack of care for her leathers, but she couldn't bring herself to care. She'd take care of it in the morning.  
  
When Lavellan had stripped down to her vallaslin, she swung her legs up onto the bed and crawled over to the burly ex-Templar, reaching out to tug at the comforter. The room was uncomfortably cold against her skin and she wanted nothing more than to cuddle up against the furnace of a man; unfortunately, Cullen was having none of it. He snorted and rolled over, the blankets wrapped so tightly around his muscular torso that it was almost as if he were magically sealed in a blanket cocoon. She pressed her lips as he let out another wall-shattering snore and mumbled in his sleep about something that sounded like dogs and swords. "Cullen," she hissed, tugging at the blankets. " _Cullen_."  
  
"Bwh… huh…?" Cullen lifted his head from the pillow and blinked at her.  
  
"Let go of the blankets," she griped at him, "I'm _cold_." He stared blankly at her; _the candles are lit, but nobody is home_. She glowered at him and huffed as he closed his eyes again, then swung off the bed and stomped over to the closet that housed the spare quilts, skin pebbling in the cold. "Just you wait, Shem," she grumbled under her breath. "You just _think_ you're going to get lucky when you wake up in the morning. Hah!" She threw the blanket on the bed and shimmied under it, wrapping herself as tightly as he was. "See if I share my blankets with you every again. Aughta let you freeze to death in that tower of yours." She pouted at his back, then closed her eyes, drifting to sleep to nefarious plans against her blanket hogging lover.


	2. Judgement and Amends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As requested, Lavellan gets her revenge.

Cullen woke with a start to the rattle of the glass doors as the wind screamed against them. He grumbled and lifted his head from where he had been comfortably buried under a mountain of blankets, eyeing the balcony doors; a blizzard had blown in overnight and made the chill room even worse. He grumbled and glared at the snow building up on the balcony.

"This is going to make her late," he huffed as he threw the blankets off and made to get up, then paused at a noise from behind him. He whipped around, hand instinctively going to his side for the sword that was hung on the armor rack, and gaped at the small pile of blankets that _certainly_ hadn't been there when he had finally collapsed the night before. He reached out carefully and pulled back the blanket just enough to allow a glimpse of the shaggy hair and pointed ears that graced his love's head. He goggled at her as she sighed in her sleep, then smiled and relaxed. He knew he should get up, should go check on the troops and make sure they were okay, but having Lavellan back early after being gone for weeks on a mission was too tempting an offer to pass up. He laid back down and tugged at the blankets, pulling them up just long enough to slip in behind the lithe mage before tucking them back down.

He had just snuggled up behind her, draping his arm around her waist, when he felt her hands come up and grab him. He smiled into the hair at the back of her neck. "I didn't mean to wake you," he murmured, giving her a gentle kiss on her shoulder.

"What _exactly_ do you think you're doing, Commander?" He huffed a laugh into her hair and pulled her tighter against him, just enjoying the feeling of her warmth against his.

"I believe I'm enjoying a lie in with a rather remarkable woman who got home half a day ahead of schedule."

"Oh really?" Something about her tone nagged at his attention, but he couldn't place it. He was about to question her on it when two unbelievably cold feet pressed against his legs. "Andraste's tits!" he yelped, jerking away from the elf, "you're feet are like _ice_!" Before he had a chance to move away, the lithe mage had rolled over and pounced on him. Every inch of her skin felt like she had been in the blizzard.

"Indeed they are!" She laughed at him as he yelped and squirmed in a highly undignified manner. "This is what happens when my Commander steals all my blankets and won't share!"

He gasped as a glacial palm pressed against his chest. "I did no such thing! You had blankets! You were covered in them when I got up!"

"Because" She focused on her magic, dropping her skin another few degrees, "I" she tightened her legs around his torso "got" she leaned her chest against his "extras!" Her fingers skittered over his ribs, finding the ticklish spots only she was allowed to exploit. He gasped and bucked, laughing as he tried to get away from the torture without actually hurting the small woman that was ineffectually pinning him down.

When she decided that he'd had enough, she released the spell and sat back, feeling her skin warm as she looked down at him. "Commander Cullen, I find you guilty of the heinous crime of blanket theft in the middle of winter. As Inquisitor, it's my job to pass judgement on you." He stared up at her, breathless from laughter. "You are hereby banned from my bed until you make amends."

He gasped in mock horror and threw a hand against his head the way he'd seen overly dramatic Orlesian women do. "No my lady! Have mercy on this wretched soul!"

"No! No mercy for your evil deeds!"

He dropped his hand and gave her a wicked smirk. "Well in that case…" he grabbed her hips and rolled them both over, pinning her to the bed by his significantly heavier weight. "I suppose I should get started on that, shouldn't I?" He leaned down and pressed a kiss beneath her ear.

She smiled and turned her head to press a kiss to his cheek. "What about the troops?"

"They can take the day off."


End file.
